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Songs From 1990

 

 

 

To see the lyrics click on the links below

Happy All the Time July ‘90

Little By Little

Cog

Grateful

I'm Out Of My Mind

This Is Me

The Dangers Of Loving You

To-My-Future-Partner

Second Best

The Shadow of Beauty

 

Your time is here

Lost in time

The Glass Child

The accidental harmony

Relativity

When it's too late

Calliope

Driving Along An Old Spanish Road

The Devils Whore

The sky is a beautiful grey and blue

When it's too late

The waking moments

Touch anybody tonight

The kiss of life

You Know That Idea

The Runaway

The neighbours I know

The train of the wedding gown

You surrendered, but there wasn't a war

Flying with the angels

I'm not singing a protest song

Love life

You know what I mean

You Can Postulate

Slice of Hell

She's waving goodbye

I know you'll be waiting

Life Of Joy

You Have lost Me

You Drew Up Maps of My Life

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When it's too late

 

 

I can hear you calling

From a window in my mind

You wave in the morning light

As you leave the world behind

 

I can hear you call

There's a ? in your eyes

You smile in the morning light

As you leave the world behind

 

? Child

Let you sleep

The world is cruel sometimes

I think of you and I wonder

I can feel your shadow shine

 

I can feel your shadow shine

Always smile when I walked in

I guess I'm cruel sometimes

I always kissed you “Hello”

You always wave “Goodbye”

You always read between the lines

When it's too late

When it's too late

 

Then we see our mistakes

Then we see our mistakes

I do not want to idolise you

I do not want to enshrine you

I just want you to know

That it's me throwing pebbles

At your window

 

When it's too late

When it's too late

We see our mistakes

We see our mistakes

 

It could have been a different world

It could have been the sweetest kiss

It could have been the secrets kept

In the most unlikely place

 

Well you held me all night

And you said it's ok

The heavens above

Will look another way

But I don't know

No I don't know

If this is a thing

That I should be involved in

 

 

This Is Me 15 March '90



Now I don't know if how I feel
Was born of dreams or to die for real
I've got this feeling deep inside
I'm longing for you to hold me tight

0h hold me tight

Like a poet in the garden
Sleeping by a pool
Of tears he stole
With a joke so cruel

0h tell me lies

Now I don't know if I'm strong or weak
To let my heart so openly speak

But this is me

Oh tell me lies

But this is me

But this is ME!

I'd like to tell you the truth
That my heart beats hard for you
I'd like to tell you the truth
That my heart beats fast for you

Now can't you see that all I have to do
Is open my mouth
And say the wrong thing to you
Now can't you see that all I have to do

Is open my heart
And say the wrong thing to you
And I will never see you again
I will never see you again.

Oh call it a day

This is me this is me
I am more than you see
Don't Tell Me Lies
0h tell me lies

 

 

You Drew Up Maps of My Life

 

 

I half stood in the dark

Like a joke of myself

You stand in white

While I talked about myself

 

Oh you could not love me then

Oh you could not love me then

 

You stood out on the pathway

You heeded the words I had to say

Will you love me?

Or do you have to go?

We stood out on the road

The cars passed by

On either side of you

And you know

With a heart of gold

You Drew Up Maps of My Life

But could not look me in my eyes

Won't you look at me?

Don't you care anymore?

 

Well you asked the pilot

To do the loop the loop

And you waved from the plane

As you passed me again and again

 

But you don't want to stay anymore

 

You sailed out on the ocean

And you told the sailors to say hello

And you told the sailors you had to go

You send me faxes where you used to phone

 

You heard enough to leave me alone

Don't you care?

Or can't you read the words I write to you

 

Bdr okl

 

 

 

 

You Have lost Me

 

You have lost me

I have misplaced the image of your face

You have lost the memory

Of my caress

 

You have lost any love you had for me

Or did you just throw it away

 

 

Sometimes the beauty is too much

Sometimes something good goes bad

Sometimes the softest touch

Throws away,

Erodes away

The love that we had

 

You have lost me

I have lost your tenderness

You have lost the emptiness

Of my caress

 

You have found what you already had

I need your line of abstracted lies

To turn the good times bad

 

Sometimes the beauty is too much

Sometimes something good goes bad

Sometimes the softest touch

Throws away,

Erodes away

The love that we had

 

You have lost me

I have misplaced the image of your face

You have lost the memory of my caress

 

You have lost any love you ever had

Did you just throw it away?

 

Sometimes the beauty is too much

Sometimes something good goes bad

Sometimes the softest touch

Throws away,

Erodes away

The love that we had

 

Bdr okl

 

Life Of Joy

 

 

I'm a leaving town a baby

I'm a leaving town for sure

And then you won't be bothered

With me hanging round your door

Well

That's all right

 

In the morning after

I know where, you know

I'm a leaving town little girl

I'm leaving town for sure

Well that's alright

 

I am nothing

Neither are you

You know it's true

You know it's true

 

It doesn't matter what you make

It doesn't matter who you break

 

I will die and so will you

There's nothing that we can do

It's gonna happen anyway

There's no delay no runaway

I'm a nothing and neither are you

 

A life of joy and a life of pain

A life of loss and a life of gain

 

If love is the saviour

Then love is all I can

It takes me from oblivion

To the heart of significance

 

 

If significance, gives me meaning

And meaning helps me through

Then it's not surprising

That I need love

And so do you

 

Well I'll keep on a yearning

And I'm sure you will too

So I'll love those love songs

To help me through

 

I am nothing and neither are you

You know it's true

But it doesn't matter

I will die and so will you

There's nothing that we can do

 

 

Bdr okl

 

 

I know you'll be waiting

 

I know you'll be lying on a bed alone,
I know you'll be waiting by the telephone,
I know you've been waiting a long long time,
I know you'll be placing your mouth to mine.

"Don't wait for me you know it's been too long,
Can't turn your right in to my wrong."

Let's go out in to the dark,
And sing to stars of broken hearts,
Let's cleanse our minds in Eden 's streams
And dream of things we've never seen.

Deep mysterious blue, that's where I found you,
Sleeping out on the cool still lawn,
Your body naked in the light of the dawn.

Love comes today then blows away,
Drive to the dream town, drive on down.
You're gonna see today
The way our love was thrown away,
You're gonna hear today
The words the devil likes to say.

Love comes and goes
And how the wind blows,
Drive right on down,
Park your heart in the dream town.

Through the flames of a midnight fire,
You took my breath away,
The flick of your fingers,
The moment lingers."Don't wait for me you know it's been too long,

Can't turn your right in to my wrong."
"My baby's on a desert track I don't think she's ever coming back,"
Hallucinations you can't walk through,
Guess I'm better off without you.

The vultures fly in the shape of a heart,
I walk in circles while you play the part,
I used to know what you wanted to be,
Now all you want is to be without me!

Hallucinations you can't talk to,
Guess I'm better off without you.

Through the scrap yards of a million cars
Resting in peace,
Love comes today then blows away,
Drive to the dream town, drive on down.

She brings to me an oasis smile,
I'd say no but I've been dying for miles
Could be my love is true,
Could be I'm better off without you.

It might have been the dreams I had when I was just a boy,
It might have been that love went bad, programmed to destroy.

 

Driving Along An Old Spanish Road

 

 

I'm driving along an old Spanish street

Racing everyone I'll never meet

The air's still warm but the night is old

The passion's high but the heart's are cold

 

And I love you

Cruise on through the night

I'm homeward bound through your old town

The engine roars as I take it down

And we're talking about yesterday

Laughing at the games we played

And I love you

The night has given us wings

 

We're doing a thousand miles in under a day

The border's close so be careful what you say

We're picking up people we don't understand

We're hiding our money and watching their hands

And I love you

Move on through the night

 

The cops are driving slowly

Watching everything we do

So I put down the pedal

When they're out of view

 

And I love you

You beautiful morning light

 

I'm a speeding agent of the night

You're a speeding agent of the night

And I love you

 

Bdr okl

Calliope

 

 

Some things are just hidden

Some things rot for a later date

She said

“You don't need me anymore, so it's time to end”

“I never loved you”

“But that wasn't the deal”

“You're nothing to me”

“And you are nothing like I thought you'd be”

 

A careful collection of material things

And in the corner a pile of dead skin

She wrapped it in paper

And put it under his bed

The souvenir of the snake

The souvenir of the snake Calliope

 

 

Okr gdl

 

She's waving goodbye

 

 

Where children lie down their hearts

On sand filled pillows

And weep for joy

For a smiling mother

 

Waving

She's waving “goodbye”

 

Turn around and show them your pain

A candle flickers

An old man sits down in the sun smiling

Yellow teeth

 

I kiss your brow

A tighter muscle now

I feel your heart gripping at my chest

 

At night, sometimes you pray,

Sometimes, you touch me

Your presence in every

Moment of silence

 

You bathed in the waters

And the waters turned to wine

And the wine turned to water

The decay in your skin

I scratch mine off before sleeping

 

I could kiss your bones

If I loved your soul

You're gasping for me

Turn around to make me see

Your teardrop on my tongue

Soothes my lust

As I pretend to sleep

 

You bathed in the blood

And the blood turned to love

And the love turned to blood

 

Standing on the roadside

I kiss your brow

A tighter muscle now

You bathed in the waters

And the waters turned to wine

And the love turned to blood

 

Bdr, gdl

Relativity

 

 

You used to dress in red

And I always wore black

You asked who was dead

And I asked who'd come back

 

I used to think the birds flew high

When of course they were near to me

I used to think that we were closely related

But that was an illusion

That was the deception

That was an illusion of relativity

 

You said it was good

You said that we did what we could

And I said all the things that I thought I should

 

You used to dress in red

And I always wore black

You asked who was dead

And I asked if they'd come back

 

You laughed and kissed me

But you never came to rescue me

I asked you where you go when you left me

 

And I always thought that we were close at heart

But relatively speaking we were miles apart

 

All I ever wanted was you

All I ever wanted was you to be my friend, and my lover

But all you ever wanted from me was a mother, father, sister and brother

 

You said it was good

You said that we did what we could

And I said all the things that I thought I should

And relatively speaking

We did relatively well

And we thought it was heaven

When, of course, it was hell

You used to dress in red

And I always wore black

You asked if I was dead

And I asked if you'd come back

 

You laughed and kissed me

But you never came to rescue me

And I always thought that we were closely related

But that was the deception of relativity

 

Okr, okl

 

 

 

Slice of Hell

 

 

Coz I've got something to say

I will say it anyway

Coz you will hit and run

I will sit and play

Coz you will dent my pride

There will be songs I will sing tonight

 

Coz you will dent my pride

There will be songs through this darkest night

I will sing to passing cars

From the silent layby

A thousand people prepare for the show

They turn up early and sit in the glow

Of a hot, summer evening, cold breeze window

 

As the darkness bends the night to day

Betrayal bends hope to hate

Too many people will talk to my back

Too many brides will dress me in black

Too many lovers will fall at my feet

It's a life of crimes and rhymes to delete

 

There's a cold, grey child inside of me

Walking the streets in the search of beauty

Lighting fires for all to see

I kick down this door and cough up a key

 

I steal this song from an old seashell

I stand on the corner trying to sell

My mother's milk for a slice of hell

 

You looked this way and saw nobody

I trusted you and you betrayed me

I will swim in the lake

And you will drink in the sea

 

As the darkness bends the night to day

Betrayal bends hope to hate

Too many people will talk to my back

Too many brides will dress me in black

Too many lovers will fall at my feet

It's a life of crimes and rhymes to delete

 

There's a cold, grey child inside of me

Walking the streets in the search of beauty

Lighting fires for all to see

I kick down this door and cough up a key

You can steal this song from an old seashell

I stand on the corner trying to sell

My mother's milk for a slice of hell

 

Okr gdl

 

 

The Runaway

 

 

Out of the door and into the night

In the cold, late rain, she thumbed for a ride

She had golden lights in her eyes

Drive me to obscurity, her heart lied

 

Spiralling the grey and rainy town

I know with this day I am going to drown

Numbed from the pain of hating that I've done

I'm a hostage to myself and I'm loading the gun

 

There's always a distance you can go by car

I need to be moved so very far

Mistakes in the navigation of the stars

Can leave you lonely, lost and scarred

 

She was unlucky in a fortunate way

Someone could see that she was a runaway

He said he'd take her home or turn her in

Then the cold and pain came rushing in

 

You've trapped me with your kindness she cried

Then you misunderstood and left me bitter inside

 

You trapped me with your gentle, loving side

And cursed me with the kisses of your pride

 

For k

Okr, okl

You can postulate

 

 

You can postulate about love and hate

You can tell me never's better than late

You can blow me a kiss and make me wait

But I've got misgivings about our mistake

 

It's a script notated, Police investigated

Children shot dead, information collated

It's a case of psychosis, underestimated

 

But there's nothing for nobody that I don't know

You're asking me if I'm ready to grow

I'll eat an apple by a flooded road

And in a cloud swept reflection

I will watch you go

 

We can preach about clearing the streets of lead

But I think we better start with our heads instead

Coz there's a ghost of a chance

That we're already dead

 

Well you came to me on a midnight train

You said if you could you'd try to explain

You rode a red horse that walked in pain

It's a beautiful excuse but baby it's lame

 

Oh you don't want love or money honey

You said you want fame

 

Okr, gdl

You Know That Idea

 

 

You know that idea about the tree falling

If you don't see it, then does it fall?

You've heard about the liberation

And what happens to the tall

 

Now, what if you don't see me on the TV

And, what if you don't hear me call

Does it mean I just don't exist?

Does it mean you don't care at all?

 

And will you invite me

Will you invite me

Will you invite me

To your secret ball

 

I'm driving south of the river

There's a woman in a chair

She's pushing herself along the road

The drivers are thinking, “yeah, she's got a nerve”

She's stranded coz there's no break in the kerb

 

So the middle of the road isn't safe anymore

And there's no way out when you block the door

And you don't mind

Till we move next door

And aren't you protected by the law?

 

You know that idea about the tree falling

If you don't see it, then does it fall?

You've heard about our liberation

And what happens to the tall

 

Now, what if you don't see me on the TV

And, what if you don't hear me call

Does it mean I just don't exist?

Does it mean you don't care at all?

 

And will you invite me

Will you invite me

Will you invite me

To your secret ball

 

Okr, okl dis

 

You know what I mean

 

 

See yourself driving along an old desert road

It is night

All you can see is what you've got in your lights

See the white lines moving along

You're moving on

 

It's just you and me travelling

It's just you and me moving along

You know what I mean

Feels so good

Going round the mountains

Feels so good

It's the kind of trip

That makes you feel good to be alive

 

The sky is a kind of electric blue

You know what I mean

It's just you and me

Feels so good just driving along

 

You're holding me

The sky is a kind of electric blue

The sort that makes you feel good to be alive

 

Okr, okl

The kiss of life

 

 

I held her with a psychic kiss

As we lay in an Edward Hopper field

I said I am sorry

But you know this love ain't real

 

There's a change in the air

And the trees are swaying

Resounding reactions to my fading speech

Casting shadows on this love I seek

 

It's been said that we never kill time

The time only ever kills you

So it has to be the kiss of love

Or it's the kiss of death for you

 

You're writing poems

With sunlight on your window

But no-one understands

You're calling my name

With a language of your hands

 

And I haven't got what you want from me

There's nothing much left for you to see

And you are nothing

Like I hoped you'd be

 

It's been said that we never kill time

The time only ever kills you

You have to be the lover of my life

Or it's the death of my love for you

 

I love the life that I'm living

The beauty that permeates my being

I love this life that I'm living

But I don't want to die alone

I don't want to die a long way from home

I don't want to die without a love of my own

 

It's been said that we never kill time

The time only ever kills you

So it has to be the lover of life

Or it's the love of death for you

I used to be a mercenary

But now I'm working for my heart

 

 

 

I used to be the kind of man

Who would tear himself a part

I'm sorry if I misunderstood you

I'm sorry if I made you cry

But it hurt me too, to continue the lie

 

It's been said that we never kill time

The time only ever kills you

So it has to be the kiss of love

Or it's the death of my life with you

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love life

 

 

Love life, she said

Love life, she said

 

Now open your eyes

To the brightness of a midnight sky

Whatever the question

The answers gonna be why

 

Decay and birth surrounds the earth

And fills us with joy and pain

I look at me, I look at us

And all I can feel is shame

 

Love life, she said

Love life, she said

 

Surround your world with lies

Protect your life with death

With a world that's full of dust

You have no-one to love

Coz there's no-one left

 

There's joy in a man who opens his eyes

To the visionless life he leads

Awe in the heart of an eye

At the sight of all the possibilities

 

Love life, she said

Love life, she said

Love

 

The accidental harmony

 

 

It felt so good, but I could see

By the way, she looked at me

That there had been

An incidental, accidental harmony

 

So I said, “where will you go and

What will you do?

Because you know my pretty baby

I will never forget you”

 

Can we collude, or will we collide?

Will we unite, will we coincide?

 

An accidental, coincidental, confidential harmonize

 

You're moving me around

Around and around

I'm spinning a charm

On the same old groud

 

I got your name, and you know my role

I'll give you a call

When I break

When I break

When I break that code

 

So I said, “where will you go and

What will you do?

Because you know my pretty baby

I will never forget you”

 

It felt so good, but I could see

By the way, she looked at me

That there had been

An incidental, accidental harmony

 

So I said, “where will you go and

What will you do?

Because you know my pretty baby

I will never forget you”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Touch anybody tonight

 

 

Trees throw their arms open to me

The cliff is so beautiful

That I could fall from it

To the cold, black sea

 

And if this is not sea spray

Then I shall say

That these are teardrops

That fell from deep inside me

 

They say the Police

Are killing the young

Children of South American slums

They chase them

They burn them

They shoot them dead

Through the apex of a cross

Carved in their head

 

Now don't tell me

That this is neither the place

Or the time

And don't tell me

That neither of our faces

Fit this crime

Coz I don't know

If I could not feel guilty

And I don't feel

That I could touch

Anybody tonight

 

The rich man and the poor man

Can live side by side

But the children of the poor

Will pay the price

Rich thieves who kill poor thieves

Need no alibis

They pay their secret Police

To sing lethal lullabies

 

I'm too wealthy to walk safely

I'm too weak to sincerely do

What I know to be right

If I could not feel guilty

And I don't feel

That I could touch

Anybody tonight

 

The Glass Child

 

 

I've been changing for a long time

The lesson's not easy today

Talk about love, talk about life

Talk, talk, our lives away

 

 

You swam in my ocean

Said the waters polluted with lies

Say what you want, do what you will

But you'll never look me in the eye

 

It's no wonder that I'm lonely

It's no wonder that I'm dying inside

How could you love a person?

Who pollutes, kills, then hides

 

A dark, heart paragraph

A gentle refrain

A false start, dead heat

Repeated again

 

The expense of lust

In an act of shame

I won't call you

Don't call me again

 

I'm lying in my bed

In this half lit land

Watching the sea

Covered in sand

 

I think about the glass child

Lasted just a short while

Buried in this half lit land

And the waves break a breaking

I lied and the child was taken

I thought I was right

My identity was mistaken

 

The knife that carves out pain in you

Leaves a vessel for joy to run through

The pain is untainted

When the heart is true

You'll feel the beauty come out of you

Out of the blue

 

You swam in my ocean

Said the waters polluted with lies

Say what you want, do what you will

But you'll never look me in the eye

 

It's no wonder that I'm lonely

It's no wonder that I'm dying inside

How could you love a person?

Who pollutes, kills, then hides

 

A dark, heart paragraph

A gentle refrain

A false start, dead heat

Repeated again

 

I've been changing for a long time

The lesson's not easy today

Talk about love, talk about life

Talk, talk, our lives away

 

 

 

Lost in time

 

 

No matter how long you stand for time

Time never stands still for you

You never wanna be lost in time

Until someone gets to loving you

 

The sadness that I have for broken dreams

You held me in a deep, dark blue

The love that I found in a waking dream

And a hand that struck me with truth

 

No matter how long you stand for time

Time never stands still for you

You never wanna be lost in time

Until someone gets to loving you

 

Now I could see when you looked at me

The meaning in our time

There's more to love you said

Than a breaking of the bread and wine

 

You held my face, you held my heart

I held you in my mind

There's nothing better in a love you said

Than a heart that's honest and kind

 

No matter how long you stand for time

Time never stands still for you

You never wanna be lost in time

Until someone gets to loving you

 

I'm here at least until the day I die

Something ought to be said

Because there's hearts and dreams

And hundreds of things

Broken along with the bread

 

No matter how long you stand for time

Time never stands still for you

You never wanna be lost in time

Until someone gets to loving you

 

Your time is here

 

 

Someone's gonna help you

Learn to help yourself

Someone's gonna help you

Get back in contact with yourself

 

Someone's gonna take the kisses of the past

And plant them in a field of blue

You'll feel the fields of love

Grow deep inside of you

 

Someone's gonna help you feel alive

Someone's gonna help you not to die

Someone's gonna fill you with a beauty

That will meet more than the back of an eye

 

You can watch the clouds go by

You can watch the clouds go by

You can watch the clouds go by

Through the bars of your chosen rage

 

Today, someone will reveal

That it's a backdrop to a second rate stage

 

Your time has come

Your time has come

Look to your heart

Your time has come

 

Your time is here

Your time is here

Your time is here

 

 

I'm Out Of My Mind

 

 

I held you in my arms

While the music played

Now the sky's lit up

And the air is cold

But in my heart

There's this love we made

 

Now I don't know why

And I don't know how

And I don't know
If I should be saying this now

 

But there was a meaning

Behind the meeting

That didn't touch your eye

 

So I kiss hello

And we'll sing goodbye

Coz I maybe be a clown

But you'll never see me cry

 

Everybody's talking to you

Knowing what you want

You'll do what you do

You move me up and down

In an ocean of you

When an undercurrent

Took me from view

 

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

 

A hundred dancers spinning

A thousand jackpots winning

A million mad hat, Cheshire cats, are grinning

They're all grinning

 

It took one scratch

From a burned out mismatch

But it didn't stop

The innocents

The innocents

From swinging

 

You can drink to my health

But I won't trust you

But then I damn well don't

Trust myself too

 

Everybody's talking to you

Knowing what you want

You'll do what you do

You move me up and down

In an ocean of you

 

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

 

I held you in my arms while the music played

And the sky lit up at the break of day

And in my heart

Is this love that I can't deny

And I don't know what to do

But I'll never cry

 

So if I won't kiss and tell

So I'll kiss and sing goodbye

 

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

Now I'm out of my mind

And it looks like I'm out of yours too

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grateful 28 October ‘90

 

When I was a child in need of material things
The local politician would his camera man bring
Him and the local charity would help me
Help them get some free publicity
Now I've seen some jokers and roller skaters
On charity runs run right past us
I felt so sorry because they didn't understand
They thought handicapped meant cap in hand
And you thought disabled meant unable

Since Johnny's tragic accident


When of course it means that we've been

He's been


DIS-ENABLED

And I was told that it was no one's fault
And I was told to be grateful
For anything they bought
But I've never seen the working class
Licking out the rich kid's ass
Or brushing the dust off the politician's coat
For getting them their rightful vote
So I don't think that I should be grateful
For the way you make me feel disabled
No I don't think that I should be grateful
For the way you add "dis" to able

Plato said he'd rather be dead

Than a man without a hand
But I'd rather be me than him any day
Because he just couldn't understand

 

 Now I don't think that you should be allowed

To feel good for what you've done
Oh what you done,

What you done, oh what you done?

'Cause when it comes to understanding

Here's the point of the story!

It takes more than a charity run
When it comes to change
It takes more
Than a program packed with fun
When it comes to brotherly love
It takes more than a sentimental song

0h sing it to me


More than a million pounds
That the last event wrung

That's handkerchief's full of teardrops
Not door bells or telephones [telethons]
Disabled is a euphemism for
Victims of a social apartheid
You better believe it baby'

* Apologies to Plato who probably didn't say that he'd rather be
dead than not have any hands. Unfortunately Aristotle, who did
say near enough the same thing, was a bit of a mouthful, so
Plato was the next best philosopher who, in syllabic terms at
least, was more appropriate

. Simon Smith

 

 

 

Cog 24 Nov 1990



Do you ever wake from dreams
Where you fall in love
Do you ever go to sleep
And not want to wake up?

Do you ever feel like
A cog on a wheel
Moved around by
The force of evil?

Do you ever talk of devils
Then try to hide
The angels and devils
That you keep inside?

Do you ever put up
A vicious fight
When you know all along
That you're not right?

Feels like evil
Yeah that's evil
Do you ever
Wake from dreams?

 

 

The waking moments

 

 

If I dreamt that I had you here

Would that be enough my dear?

Would the waking moments

Always be too near

 

And the feelings that I've had

And the depths that I've dived

Could the dream be

Could it be all I need?

 

Would the waking moments

Always be too sad for me

 

Would the waking moments

Always be here

 

 

 

Ngr, okl

I'm not singing a protest song

 

 

Now I'm not singing a protest song

But I ain't saying that nothing is wrong

For I just thought you'd like to come along

And see how I feel

 

Now I'm not trying to spoil your day

But maybe I'd like to change your ways

I just thought you'd like to play

And see how you feel

 

Now I'm not here coz I ain't got nothing to do

There's a life I have outside of me and you

I just thought that I was almost through

So how do you feel?

 

Now I'm not aiming to attack

But, maybe, I got up your back

I just thought that you might be getting stuck

So how do you feel?

 

Now I'm not just looking for a friend

Coz it's all the same in the end

I just thought you had to condescend

To see how I feel?

 

Ngl, okl

 

Little By Little 14 November '90

 

Little by little I will go away
Little by little you will learn the lines
That you've got say, you've got to say
Little by little I will fall from view
Little by little I will lose you
Learn about a life without you


A place in my mind that I will go
A place in my life that you got to know
A scar in my heart that I'm proud to show
You said not to stay so we went with the flow

I've been taught about passion many a time
I've been taught about love and given the signs
I've been taught about the way we're meant to be
I followed the river and you flowed through me

There's a peace in my heart when you are near
It's something I love, something that's dear
It's something to lose and its loss I fear
The river is pure and the river is clear

 

Flying with the angels

 

I'm on the side of the angels

And the helicopters are flying high

I am with you

Wrapped in the lightness

Of this midnight sky

 

Just look at that

Aint it something?

Just look at me

Aint I somebody?

 

Well we're flying

With the angels tonight

We're blinded

By their guiding lights

 

I am with you

I am with you in this deepest blue

I am keeping your heart in view

Can you hear them singing

Or is it the blades just humming?

 

Ngr, gdl

 

You surrendered, but there wasn't a war

 

You surrendered but there wasn't a war

You're crawling around, on a cold tile floor

You're calling my name

Oh, you're clutching at straws

 

I'd rather be alone, than be seen with you

I'd rather be bored, than be with you

I'd rather decompose out of view

Than be buried in a grave with you

 

My heart is speaking now

How could you allow?

Yourself to do, yourself to do

This to me

 

I'd rather forgive, than forget

I'd rather we had never met

I'd rather admit, to my regret

Than live to the rules

That you try to set

 

The distance of time

Oh, time is unkind

My heart can speak

In languages as soft as pain

 

My heart is speaking now

How could you allow?

Yourself to do, yourself to do

This to me

 

Impulsion and compulsion

Impulsion and compulsion

Betrayal, Betrayal, Betrayal

And amnesia

 

You surrendered but there wasn't a war

You're crawling around, on a cold tile floor

You're calling my name

Oh, you're clutching at straws

 

 

The train of the wedding gown

 

 

Love is a simple and beautiful thing

Sometimes, there's pain and the baggage that it brings

Sometimes, the train of the wedding gown

Pulls the hearts of the lovers, lovers down

 

Is it possible for a man and a woman to live together

To have sex and children, to love forever

The pain and turmoil, the turmoil and pain

The conflict and strain

 

Is it possible to, to be free, but always with me

Is this thought so bad, will you always be, always be with me?

Is the nature of love, the nature of love, always to be sad with me

 

Love is a simple and beautiful thing

Sometimes, there's pain and the baggage that it brings

Sometimes, the doubts and fears, sometimes the lust and tears

Sometimes, the green and sometimes the greed

Is all that the devil needs

 

Oh love, oh love, oh love is a simple and beautiful thing

But sometimes there's pain in the baggage it brings

Sometimes, the train of the wedding gown

Pulls the hearts of the lovers, lovers down

 

Sometimes, the doubts and fears, sometimes the lust and tears

Sometimes, the green and sometimes the greed

Is all that the devil needs

Is all that the devil needs

 

Oh love, oh love, oh love is a simple and beautiful thing

It's just the realization it brings

The emptiness in your life

The emptiness in your life

The emptiness in your life

 

Is it possible for a man and a woman to live together

To have sex and children, to love forever

 

Ngr, okl

The neighbours I know

 

 

There's Chris and Louis, Martin and Joe

The Johnsons, Marie, Fiona and co.

There's Shaun and Carl, the kids and Flo

These are a few of the neighbours I know

 

There's black and white, rich and poor

The good and bad on each other's door

There's loud and quiet, the humble and brash

The eager to please and eager to smash

 

The kind at heart and the kind of smart

The quick to fly and the slow to die

The clever and thick and the mud that sticks

The sexy, the strange, the noise of the planes

 

The quiet affair, the ones who don't care

The medium, the rare, the neighbourhood stare

The girl who goes bare

The boy with no hair

 

The disabled man with his disability van, (a Porsche)

The disabled lady with her husband, Brady,

And four kids, Patrick, Sharon, Lesley and Sadie

 

The car washing co., who sparkle and glow

The bikers, commuters, the unemployed and the unknown

The rich man, the poor man, the beggar man and thief

That just about covers my neighbourhood brief

 

Ngr okl

 

 

Happy All the Time
July ‘90

 

You cannot judge the man by the funeral
You cannot judge a man at all
You cannot hold a precious thing forever
One day you've got to let it fall

I cannot keep you happy all the time
I cannot say "I'm yours and you're mine"
I cannot say, "I'll love you forever"
But you know I'll keep you in my mind.

We cannot understand all our feelings
I cannot say I know how you feel
We cannot empathize in every way
But understanding helps the scars to heal.

Now they can not do what isn't right for them
They can only help when it suits their needs
They cannot do what they do not want
If they want they'll laugh while you bleed

She cannot say what's right for her is right for him
They cannot search for meaning without pain
She suffers his light heart life for too long
Now he laughs at her as she takes him back again
.
You and I cannot deny the judging that we do
When we stand so proud in these justice halls
I used to think these walls could hear
But now I know it's just these eyes have walls.

 

When it's too late

 

 

I can hear you calling

From a window in my mind

You wave in the morning light

As you leave the world behind

 

I can hear you call

There's a ? in your eyes

You smile in the morning light

As you leave the world behind

 

? Child

Let you sleep

The world is cruel sometimes

I think of you and I wonder

I can feel your shadow shine

 

I can feel your shadow shine

Always smile when I walked in

I guess I'm cruel sometimes

I always kissed you “Hello”

You always wave “Goodbye”

You always read between the lines

When it's too late

When it's too late

 

Then we see our mistakes

Then we see our mistakes

I do not want to idolise you

I do not want to enshrine you

I just want you to know

That it's me throwing pebbles

At your window

 

When it's too late

When it's too late

We see our mistakes

We see our mistakes

 

It could have been a different world

It could have been the sweetest kiss

It could have been the secrets kept

In the most unlikely place

 

Well you held me all night

And you said it's ok

The heavens above

Will look another way

But I don't know

No I don't know

If this is a thing

That I should be involved in

 

 

The Shadow of Beauty

 

 

The birds spiralled over our houses

And covered us in the shadow of beauty

And the sky was a grey and mauve

I stood at my window

I wish that they would never go away

I wish that you'd stay

 

The beauty of the world is a light

In the darkest night

The beauty of your love for me

Is a light to help me see

The beauty of the world

Will help you set yourself free

 

In the night I hear you calling me

Whispering tenderly

In the night I hear you calling me

Whispering tenderly

Calling to my keeper

Calling to my keeper

To set me free

To set me free

 

The birds spiralled over our houses

And covered us in the shadow of beauty

And the sky was a grey and mauve

I stood at my window

I wish that they would never go away

I wish that you'd stay

 

The beauty of the world is a light

In the darkest night

The beauty of your love for me

Is a light to help me see

The beauty of the world

Will help you set yourself free

 

In the night I hear you calling me

Whispering tenderly

In the night I hear you calling me

Whispering tenderly

Calling to my keeper

Calling to my keeper

To set me free

To set me free

 

 

The Dangers Of Loving You

Where am I
Am I in your head?
What colour am I
Almost a blood red?
You could have chosen a colder man
Almost the silent spirit sang

For a woman I'd rather leave alone, you've warmed me to the bone
For a person who scares me, for a person who scares me
You've weakened me,
Oh you've weakened me.

Is it the thrill of the fear
Is it the beauty of holding you near
Is it a case of hard to reach
Is there poison in this Holy feast
Is there poison in this feast.

So many unresolved amourettes
A case of never really met
And best
To forget

Sometimes I take a dangerous risk
In holding my heart to your gentle kiss
Sometimes I take
A dangerous risk.

And my body is aching
And I'm all confused
But it's a cycle of events
That I always choose
An action paragraph
That's been
Cut in
Half.

So I question the speed and I wonder if it's lust
'Cause I never really know what's going on between us

I could look for you in a lonely life or two
But there's something about a chase that obliterates your face
So it's a case of theft or a price to pay

For a woman I'd rather leave alone, you've warmed me to the bone
A person who scares me, for a person whose weakness scares me
You've weakened me, oh you've weakened me.

So let me tell you that it's not always enough
It's not enough to be told
And I told you and I told me too
But I forgot to tell all of me
About the dangers of wanting you
About the dangers of loving you


29.10.1990 Simon Smith

 

 

The Devils Whore


There's people in the world
Who want to
Destroy me and you
There's people who want to
Break the beautiful old
And the beautiful few
There's people
Who'll fight a war
And wear the garter
Of the devils whore

There's people who try to explain their behaviour
There's people who'll wait for the work of the saviour
They'll be sitting in their pious places
Hailing Mary and their saving graces
But I don't know if we exist after death
I don't know if we'll be judged
But God if you can hear me
Please have mercy on this dark soul of mine

I can not pretend to be so good
And my honesty is no saving grace
I am not so honest that I can have
Just one suit and just one face

Oh I'm not beautiful
And my soul is not so old
And though I've been a whore
The devil's no longer my madam
But we've done some deals
And she holds me still
To these old seals

And the gang is always there
Sitting by the shores of death
The devils whores of death
The devils whores of death

25.5.1990 Simon Smith

 




The sky is a beautiful grey

The love of a woman and the love of a man
The love of a child and the lie of the land
The love of the people and the touch of your hand
The love for a person who you half understand

The sky is a beautiful grey and blue
I've got this sense of peace from the breeze
May be it'll pass over you
May be you'll catch my thoughts
And you'll be pleased
I've got this sense of you

From the breeze

The blue in your eyes and your body on mine
The things that you said on the telephone line
The kisses you gave me were the soul loving kind
But there's something we lost and there's someone to find

I've seen some friends today and we had a good time
I'm alone now but  I'm feeling fine
It's true I miss you

But the sky is a beautiful grey and blue

The cool of the evening
The highs and the lows
The cool of the morning
Goodbyes and hellos
The traitor within me who takes me away
Away from your soul in the warmth of the day.

I created some things today,
Not as good as that blue and grey
But that's O.K.
I did it 'cos I love it and I love the blue and grey
I'm feeling so lucky that it passed this way.

The heat of the night the heat of the noon
The coldness of the mourning, that death came too soon
The planting in springtime and the burial at sea
The soul loving kind that comes back to me

The sky is a beautiful grey and blue
I've got this sense of peace from, the breeze
May be it will pass over you
May be you'll catch my thoughts and you'll be pleased
I've got this sense of peace from, the breeze


30.6.1990 Simon Smith

 


It's half way through the week

It's half way through the week
There's letters still unsent
It's half way through the month
I'm still owing on the rent

There's a tide coming in
There's water at my feet
The visitors book is full
There's a lover still to meet.

She's stepping in puddles
In an early morning street.
She thinks our chance has gone
And the finder always keeps.

The cinematic kiss
The silence of retreat
The smell of the shore
After months at sea
A life of loss leaders
Are coming home for me.

"What could have been
May never be."


3.1990 Simon Smith

To-My-Future-Partner

She said the words were beautiful
That I said about you
She said the words were beautiful
But I don't know if they're true

I think back to times
When I was alone
I think back to times
When I was alone
I think back to times

There's mystical lines on the face you drew
On the map of the land the sea
Where I was conceived
There's mystical lines
That pass between you and me

Now I've got a twin from another life
She said be calm take my arm
Hold on tight

Two men were talking
And I kissed your knee
We swam in blue waters
And they handcuffed me
They held me down
They held me down
They held me down
But I'm not sorry

You don't seem to move
But behind that strobe of light
You dance

I can feel you

The tears you cried found their way to me
Like crocodiles

Reptiles
Tied up
Set free

20.11.1990 Simon Smith

 

 

Second Best
14.3.1990 Simon Smith

Sometimes you're going, going away I call from my bed, but you won't stay When I wake up it's the middle of the day Sometimes my life just goes that way. Somedays we're friends others we're not Somedays I have what you'd call a lot Somedays I haven't what others have got Some days I have what I wish I had not Some live for money some for love Some like to push some like to shove Some like to live some want to die Some sit still while others try to fly Mud on your hands and blood in your eye You kissed my heart with the sweetest lie Pulled the sheets over my head Closed the door and left me for dead. Sometimes we've been running running for so long That we exchange our lives for a pocket full of songs Sometimes we put on our bulletproof vests And exchange a life of loving for a love that's second best.